Reaching Beyond the Choir

After far too much deliberation, I’ve finally decided which book I’m going to write.  I’ve been debating between two for quite some time (with a third outside contender), but I now know which way to go.  Thanks, Cap.

The book I’ll be writing is Manosphere focused.  I’ve read around enough for a common theme to gel together in my head, and I have the skills to match the goals I have in mind for the book.  I’ve got an outline and know where I want to go except for a couple of random issues I won’t have to nail down until later.

The thesis is mine and the content will be structured according to what I think needs to be said and how I want to say it.  However, I must humbly admit that I’ve reached many of my conclusions because of the ideas, writing, and experiences of other bloggers and commenters here within the ‘sphere.

Therefore, I intend to use a decent amount that’s already been written by others.  Others have experienced certain things I haven’t.  There are posts and comments floating around out there that say much of what I’d like to say myself, so I see no reason to re-invent the wheel so long as I give sufficient credit and obtain permission from the writers in question.  The Manosphere has had an enormous impact on my life, and part of the purpose of this book is to spread the influence of both its individual writers and the Manosphere as a whole.

However, there’s a lot of great stuff out there I’ve read but don’t know when or where, and there’s a lot more I haven’t even encountered.  That’s why I’ll be asking for help sometimes from y’all.  Here’s my first set of requests:

First, I’m looking for posts or comments that do a great job describing the life of the average Game-less schlub.  The three best examples of this I know are Confessions of a Reformed Incel by M3, The Life of a Beta by Free Northerner, Obsidian’s Tyrone posts.

However, I’m sure there are others.  If you know of a post or comment that you thought really brought it home to you how modern guys are screwed, I request that you either put a link in the comments or send it to me in an  email.

I reiterate that I have no intention of “stealing” anything from anyone.  If I don’t get permission to use a blog post, I won’t, and everybody who reads the book will know where it comes from.

Second, I’d like good descriptions of the modern feral female.  Two that spring to mind are Roosh’s Patricia’s Smartphone and Delicious Tacos’s These Kids Today.  The problem is that each of these is a little over-the-top (although I’ll probably still use them), so if you know of another description that might be a little more accessible, please let me know.

Third, success stories.  I know I’ve come across even better ones than this one at Heartiste, but I’m drawing a blank.  (I’m looking more for changed lives, outlooks, and improved relationships than improved N counts or flags.)

If you’re a blogger and you’ve written something that fits any of these descriptions yourself, let me know.  Fortune favors the bold.

Fourth, I’ll soon be setting up a private blog in which I’ll request advice, etc., and I’ll be inviting some of you to sign up.  Some of you will be getting invitations whether you like it or not, but if any of you wants to help revise and/or consult, let me know.  Either leave a comment with your correct email ( doesn’t count) or send me an email directly.

However, that blog will have to be reserved for people I trust.  I trust some of you bloggers and frequent commenters.  Unfortunately, if you’re a lurker who’s inspired beyond belief by my writing and you’re just dying to do this, if I have no idea who you are, I can’t trust you.  You can give it a shot to try to get in, but I might have a couple of hoops for you to jump through first.

Pulling this off is going to take a ton of effort on my part.  For a while life will basically be gym-work-write-sleep-repeat, so my apartment might start smelling, the car will remain unwashed, my toenails won’t get clipped as often as they should.

Nevertheless, I know what needs to be said, and I have this goofy sensation that I’m the one to say it.  I need to work with a longer form than blogging.  I’ll continue with the blog, but posting might be more erratic.

For I’ve found that most of the folks who comment here agree with me.  That’s great, and I’ve learned a lot from many of you.  However, I’ve got to start reaching people who aren’t as inclined to agree with me, and this is how I can do it.

In the meantime, thanks for everything.  I’ll still be here.  I’ve learned much from many of you, and hopefully I can effectively refine and amplify the best of what you have to say.

This entry was posted in Alpha, Arts, Culture, Rhetoric. Bookmark the permalink.

25 Responses to Reaching Beyond the Choir

  1. donalgraeme says:

    Sounds promising…

  2. @ Donal

    More like intriguing.

  3. M3 says:

    You have my permission to use anything you like.

    I am currently working on a draft of a post showing how my life changed from my feminist mindset to the redpill mindset. Once it’s up, i’ll let you know about it and you can see if it’s worthwhile to include it.

    Cheers mate, and thanks! You know where to send the invite 😉

  4. You want an example of a feral female? Go look at Jenny Erikson.

  5. Luis says:

    go for it my brother,

  6. theshadowedknight says:

    Get Donal’s post on Need and Void. That was good.

    The Shadowed Knight

  7. I’m excited. God speed

  8. Though my first thoughts have already been mentioned, I’ll keep an eye out for anything that comes along which will fit. This sounds like it might be a front-line-soldier view of the cultural war Ironwood discussed on a more strategic level in his book. Definitely something that will bridge the gap to the average guy who might wonder what all this is about, and a book that would have changed my world back in school days.

  9. Stingray says:

    You’ve probably read it, but Dave in Hawaii’s (Hawaii Libertarian) story at Roissy is a fantastic one. If you haven’t read it, it’s how, in his marriage, he went from beta follower of his wife to the leader of his home. How he changed and how his wife responded to it. It’s fantastic!

    I don’t have a link right now, but I’ll try and find it.

  10. Martel says:

    Thanks, Sting. Fair warning: I will be requesting permission to use a passage or two from you.

  11. Pingback: Lightning Round – 22/01/14 | Free Northerner

  12. Wald says:

    Should you find anything of mine useful, you may use it at will. I just want my ideas credited to my name.


  13. How do reconcile Christianity with,um, Delicious Tacos? (average/okay porn narrative, but you don’t really believe him, do you?) How do you reconcile the lack of morality in “game” with your belief in God? Delicious Tacos says, in your link, that we (women) are disgusting filthy animals. I take it you do not believe the book of Proverbs, that a virtuous woman is worth more than the price of rubies? Because calling women animals and enthusiastically fucking them, will not bring you this sort of woman. She is not in “GAME”–so I take it that the sexual morality of Christianity, you either consider 1) not your problem, in that these rules do not apply to you or 2) part of Christianity you simply do not subscribe to? Really, I am curious.

    As Jay McInerney once wrote, “Why am I coming to a place like this, looking for a girl who would never come to a place like this?” He tried to answer that question, but now, I will put the question to you.

    Or are you not looking for a wife? You wish to stay single and fornicate, defying Christianity? Do you go to an orthodox church and still do “game”? How do you manage the contradiction?

    If you have written about this before, feel free to link. I am not picking a fight, genuinely curious.

    • Martel says:

      I AGREE with that proverbial assessment of virtuous women, I just find that Proverbs 11:22 more accurately describes the women Delicious Tacos is writing about. Moreover, have you ever seen me claim that men somehow aren’t depraved as well?

      I don’t find Game immoral, merely amoral. It describes how people are and what practices are likely to inspire certain responses in women (primarily sexual).

      Although Game can (and I readily admit often is) be used to achieve immoral ends, that doesn’t make Game itself immoral. Game has also been used to save marriages and help men find virtuous wives.

      “Because calling women animals and enthusiastically fucking them, will not bring you this sort of woman.”

      Correct, which is why I’m not doing that. There are parts of Game that apply primarily to less “discrete” women, others that apply to all of them. Because I’ve internalize a lot of game, promiscuous women frequently express their desire for me. I just don’t go for it.

      I believe that the rules most decidedly DO apply to me, and I do my best to adhere to them. Yet if I wanted to break the rules I’d be more than capable.

  14. “It describes how people are and what practices are likely to inspire certain responses in women (primarily sexual)”

    I guess what I am saying (trying on my old Christian clothes and finding they are a bit of tight fit, so bear with me!)… is that I think these responses will bring the “game” out of her too. I think the goal should be to drop bullshit “games” and manipulation and connect as SOULS.

    How can planned-manipulation lead to finding someone “virtuous”? If she somehow finds out what kinds of head-trips you ran on her, do you think she will appreciate that? Or will she feel that she was somehow “tricked”? Maybe this is okay for one-nighters (she probably tricked you right back) but this is not okay for the woman you want to be the mother of your babies. If she is truly virtuous, she won’t enjoy believing she was “played”–which of course makes YOU the “player”–attractive virtuous women spend MOST of their time fielding “players” actually.

    Just adding my caveats.

    If I was a man who wanted “nice” girls these days, I’d go to the conventions, there are an amazing number of cute geeky girls there. Every year brings more–fandom is where its at, my friends. HeroesCon, Dragon*Con, all of those, and lots of girl dressed up in Princess Leia slave drag and other such get-ups. (check out the Dragon Con photos on my Flickr page, if you want more) If you join one of the online groups for the cons, maybe you can have people to meet all lined up before you get there. Really, this is my advice to both men and women looking for partners these days. And if you ain’t into superheroes or comics or movies or Game of Thrones, never mind.

    But hey, I’d pretend I was, anyway! 😉

    • Martel says:

      Game and who a guy really is aren’t entirely disconnected.

      For example, we know that women don’t like needy guys. One of the tenents of Game is that he should wait 20 minutes before responding to texts so as to seem more aloof and not needy.

      When a guy starts out, he’s still needy, nervous, etc., so he fakes it. He’s watching the clock before his reply (although she can’t tell that he’s needy yet).

      But eventually, he finds that it’s pointless to just sit there and wait 20 minutes so he finds something better to do. Soon enough, he’s not “waiting” to text her, he’s actually preoccupied with other things, interests, etc. Through his initial “fakery” he gradually actually becomes the type of guy women are more interested in.

      Soon enough, it doesn’t matter whether he texts back in 2 minutes or the next day, for through mimicking the behaviors of desireable men, he genuinely becomes one. The tricks and techniques he learned in the beginning have become internalized, they’re not mimicry, they’re who he really is.

      Boys are being trained that if they want to get muddy and be boys that there’s something wrong with them so many habitually stop acting male. As they grown older, not only is this unattractive to women, it’s somewhat a disconnect between how they act and their “souls”. By unlearning all the “be nice” crap and learning instead how to “act like a man”, it enables their “true self” to come to the fore which allows for the eventual deeper connection you describe.

      I’ll admit that some of it is “tricks”, but the tricks are actually the things that a naturally strong man does automatically. When he internalizes the external masculine behaviors, he’s more capable to get what he wants out of life whether it’s something he shouldn’t want (i.e. tons of one-night stands) or something he should (a happy marriage or fulfilling life as a single man). Which he chooses is a valid but distinct question, for whether or not he wants what he should want, if he’s not a man he won’t get it.

  15. Oh sorry, in moderation… I linked a bunch of pictures of girls. Trying to get you a date with NICE FANGIRLS. LOL

  16. Bob says:

    Confessions of a reformed incel is BS. If you read it carefully, it says even is marriage counselor did not to correct false ideas. Red flag #1. Then it says that when he went to strip club to bang that polish girl, he left his now ex wife’s birthday party. Meaning he was married at the time. And he didn’t leave because she was mean and didn’t give him sex, instead he was just bored. That is NOT incel.

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