Sunshine Mary’s done it. Roosh has, too. And it appears as though C. M. Sturges is doing something similar.
A reader is working on a guest post that I’ll put up when he’s done, but after that, I’m taking a break from blogging.
Certain aspects of blogging have always been a challenge for me, namely that I have so much running through my head at any given moment that it can be difficult to settle on any single thing. My primary focus has been Manospherish stuff, but to me, that’s just one aspect of Truth, an important but somewhat narrow part of what I’ve got to say.
I see a common thread running through modern sexual trends, economics, race, Game, politics, Christianity, rhetoric, culture, and damn near anything else. When I’m talking to people in person, this makes me pretty interesting, for I compare economic policies with spiritual laws and somehow tie it all together with The Avengers movie. Unfortunately, that’s hard to do in a blog post.
I’ve somehow still managed to remain coherent, but lately that’s been getting rougher. I start writing as soon as I get all my stuff set for the next day, and no matter how simply I think my initial topic is going to be, I’m trying to cram everything in before Starbucks kicks me out (which is already after I should have gone to bed). Sometimes I write the same post over multiple sessions, but for reasons that would take too long to explain, that doesn’t help.
As a result, although I know that a lot of you like my posts, lately they’re not up to my own standards.
Three things are missing.
First, I understand my Mission, but somehow in its current form, Alpha Is Assumed isn’t fitting into it quite as well as it should. I’m not yet sure whether I need to broaden my focus, narrow it, or change it altogether. On one hand, I’d like to get much more intensely personal regarding my life’s history (one of the weirdest you’ll encounter) and current challenges. On the other hand, I want to deal with the broader issues like how other forms of leftism relate to feminism and how to change it on a mass scale as I continue with a lot of the themes I’ve already been writing about. And there’s a ton of stuff I haven’t even touched on.
I’ve also begun writing a couple of books, and I need to figure out how to finish them while doing this. Should this blog overlap what I’m writing in those, or should I narrow things here and deal with other stuff there? Again, it’s hard for me to compartmentalize because in my mind it’s all the same thing. I’ve also gotten a couple of opportunities that relate directly to my Mission, and those are going to take some time.
I’ll figure it out, but I need some time.
Second, I’m able to read a fair amount of blogs, but I haven’t had time to read books. There’s value to quickly digesting info from disparate sources on the internet, but there’s also value to just letting my mind get absorbed in a single big idea. The reason I have so much to say myself is that I’ve spent so much time taking in what others have to say. I still do that, but recently so much of what I take in gets rehashed and spit back out here. I need to just shut up and listen for a while without urgently wondering how whatever I’m hearing will fit into my next post.
So a lot of the time I’ve been spent writing will be spent reading instead.
Third, it’s nothing major, but there are some personal things that have backed up that I need to attend to. When I’m caught up, I’m a master of time management, but I let myself get behind, and that slows me down. I’ve got to fit more into life than I do now, but that requires backing up a bit. I also have a couple of personal challenges that aren’t exactly in the way, but they’re not helping, either.
How long will it be? As long as it takes. It might be a week or two, it might be longer.
When I return, it might be the same old blog, I might change things up quite a bit. I’ve written rough drafts of posts that almost read like fiction in which I describe my nights out on the town, past relationships, and my family (one of the most dysfunctional ever despite including some truly wonderful people). I’ve also saved some straight philosophy posts, others just on religion, still others that are much like what I’ve already done.
One thing I’m considering doing are video podcasts of some sort. For whatever reason, I make more of an impact when people can see and/or hear me, so that might be something to bring here. If anybody has any technical advice on user-friendly editing software, please let me know.
For those of you who are bloggers, I’ll still be reading your stuff, and I might even comment occasionally. When I like a post I may well leave a picture of my hammer in the “like” square, and of course I’ll read and respond to comments here. I might even write posts and not put them up, so don’t be surprised if you get some belated pingbacks.
I’m also interacting over email and in other ways with some of you, and I’ll continue to do that. Each of you with whom I have some sort of correspondence I regard incredibly highly, so I’m not dropping you.
In the meantime, any prayers are welcome.
The basis for my philosophy is how Christ responded to the temptations in the desert; just about everything I think and believe derives from that. As I move forward with my own sort of ministry, it looks like I’ve got to spend some time in a metaphoric desert myself.
And just like Him, I might get a bit frazzled, but I will come stumbling back.
Thank you all.
Alpha Is Assumed 
Take the retreat into the wilderness, make your sacrifices, and we’ll be here to welcome you with open arms upon your return.
I wonder if you’re inhibiting your writing process by trying to be too organized too soon. Have you considered using the blog as a clearinghouse for fragmented first drafts? Then using the feedback to help knit the fragments into books? For the cost of less organized blog posts, you might wind up with much better organized books. And I’d like to see more of this “common thread”, even if it means your posts ramble.
Just a thought based on what you’ve said here about your style.
“I wonder if you’re inhibiting your writing process by trying to be too organized too soon.”
Correct, but also it’s opposite.
The books are based on cohesive threads, but the blog posts relate to the immediate. I try to connect the immediate (current events, other blog posts, etc.) to my eternal themes, but in so doing I’m not presenting those themes as coherently as I’d like to.
So, I’ve got to figure out how to do that better. Perhaps I merely need to think less about the “big picture” and let the overall theme take care of itself on the blog and use the book for that; two outlets for two different parts of my brain. Perhaps I should construct the blog more according to those themes, using whatever blog post by whomever or current event to illustrate the next part of my overall thread (which is closer to what you advocate).
Or maybe something else altogether. Regardless, at the moment I’m pulled in several directions, I have limited time with an actual life to live, so I’ve got to step back for a bit to figure out how to maximize my resources more effectively.
Thanks for the comment. You WILL see that “common thread” eventually.
Well, I look forward to your return. Sometimes you have to take a break, to get your head clear. You can come back better for it.
The Shadowed Knight
40 days.
Better that than 40 years.
Breaks are good…I’ve found it’s just as important to go out and experience life as it is to write about it.
The problem of everything being part of everything else, making it really hard to write about any one aspect, is a familiar one. It’s one of the reasons I’ve been stuck in analysis paralysis over starting my own writing. When you are, essentially, presenting a vision of reality that is so different from what people have been told for so long, it’s like describing a different world that not only looks different but has different laws of physics. People get stuck on why the sky is a pale green and it’s easy to get confused over whether to explain about refraction or put it on hold while continuing the original point about balancing color in landscape photos. Ok, wacky example, but you see what I mean (probably). It’s a giant pile of stuff that has to be apprehended on macro and micro levels to make sense, but requires discussion on both ends. Where do you start?
No, I haven’t had much coffee yet. Why do you ask?
Earlier comments have hedged at the notion of working with smaller conceptual chunks, which would yield more thoroughly focused yet shorter articles. This might be a good idea, both for regularity of writing and trying out things in pre-book form. Just a thought.
“Where do you start?”
My answer to this has been to just start, which is good. I used to let this issue stymie me entirely, and I overcame that through doing this.
But now that I’ve proven that I’ve got some follow-through, I need to make sure I use that skill as efficiently as possible. This requires some strategizing. I tried doing it while simultaneously doing the blog, and it didn’t work.
In your case, my humble opinion is that you should simply dive in and start doing it, even if “it” turns out to be wrong. Your ideas are great and you need to share them, even if you don’t do it particularly well ast first.
That was my suspicion, that I simply need to do it and stop agonizing over starting out in the best possible way. The best possible way isn’t accessible at the beginning, is it? Not usually. I shall take your advice and dive in, as practice is the only reasonable way to improve. Thanks for your encouragement, by the way – it’s definitely appreciated!
have been loving your blog posts, look forward to your return!
John,
Starting out was incredibly awkward for me, too. I was used to joining in a discussion, not starting one. I very much disliked my first several posts, but they were very necessary. I think it’s just part of the process of getting into the groove.
@ John: When I read some of my early posts, I cringe, but that’s part of the process. You won’t get it “right” immediately, but you’ll be righter than you are just sitting on all of your ideas forever.
Email me if you get it started and/or want advice (I might be floating away from the Manosphere for a bit so I can’t guarantee I’ll know if it’s there. I’ll gladly comment to help you give the impression that other peole are actually reading it or help with whatever else.
Thank you both – your advice from farther down the road is encouraging! I’ll send you an email with the details that aren’t so relevant here.
…or I would. Stingray, I don’t seem to have your email about.
Enjoy your break Martel… you’ll be missed.
Good luck. Hope you return soon. I enjoy reading your blog – particularly how you tie in politics to manosphere ideas.
Pingback: Lightning Round – 2013/10/09 | Free Northerner
I have just said a prayer for you, Martel. Breaks are good thing and it’s wise to take them every so often to refocus on God.