One Ball at a Time

Boys need adventure and challenge to grow up properly.  They need time to run through fields and break things.  Occasionally, knees must be skinned.  Challenges must be confronted.  Sometimes, they’ll have to deal with failure, maybe even find a way to deal with a bully on their own.  Yes, this hurts their feelings, but do you think John Wayne got that way by being coddled?

But their parents solve every conceivable problem for them, shield them from every potential heartbreak.  If they have an issue with the teacher, either it’s the teacher’s fault or the kid belongs on drugs.  They’re taught to value cooperation and teamwork over achievement.  Bullies are a problem for administrators and documentary film-makers to solve, not the kids themselves.

Helmets on tricycles.  Grade inflation.  Not keeping score for T-ball.  Adult supervision every minute the kid is outside.  Cooperative learning.  Suspensions for pretending a chicken nugget is a gun.  He watches Dad submit to Mom (if he happens to have one) and is continually reminded of the superior behavior of his sister.

Don’t forget your knee-pads before you get on that bike!  No teeter-totters or they might sue the school.

One gone, one to go.

So he graduates from college drowning in debt.  Never before has he had to confront an actual challenge, and now he’s so much in the hole it would make his badass grandfather who survived Chosin cower.  The economy’s a complete mess so he can’t find a job, and even if he could, it would bore the crap out of anyone with so much of an ounce of testosterone.  If he manages to create something, he’s told “You Didn’t Build That.”

Hard as hell to start a business, to take off for Brazil, to find a workplace in which he doesn’t have to carefully mind the sensitivities of his co-workers.  And those charming American girls!

Either living in mom’s basement or a drone by age twenty-four.

Got rid of that one, too.

American kids are spoiled as hell, I know (girls more than boys, however).  There’s no denying it.

Spoiled kids have an especially hard time with basic challenges, but being spoiled makes actual tangible difficulties like massive debt in a tanking economy even more difficult.

And even if the poor guy gets it right, finds a job, and does the “right” thing, he’s years away from any chance of living life on his own terms.

So he might as well just master Call of Duty.

We’ve been amazingly lucky in this country, maybe too lucky for too long.  We have no idea how rough it can really get.  I’ve been in the Army and been to a combat zone (not actual combat), so I’ve gotten a glimpse.

Yet I know what our soldiers and Marines survived on Okinawa, and I can’t imagine us finding enough young men today to even be capable of pulling something like that off.  (And I don’t think that female soldiers would help a whole lot.  Anyone who thinks that women storming Normandy alongside men would have helped us win knows nothing about the realities of combat.)

More than ever before, the men of today are both incapable of doing what it takes and seeing much reason to try.  They’ve been stripped of their privileges and rendered impotent in the face of their responsibilities.  They’re incapable of sacrifice because they’ve no real core to put on the line.  They can’t handle failure, and success just means that the giant numbers on the loan statement eventually get a little bit smaller.

And if it really hits the fan we’re toast.  We’ll be expecting men who’ve had everything handed to them for the first two decades of their lives to sweat and toil to maintain a fraction of their current standard of living.

Over at Jezebel they can criticize men for whining all the want, but one of these days it might even bug them that so many men today have “gone Galt”.  Maybe the guys will get some sympathy.

Or maybe not.

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9 Responses to One Ball at a Time

  1. Stingray says:

    There is a counter movement, Martel. There is, but it’s still relatively small. 2,000,000 homeschoolers and more are pulling their kids from school everyday for all the reasons you described for boys and to save their girls from a different but just as dangerous fate.

    I catch grief whenever we go to the pediatricians office because I don’t make our kids wear bike helmets. I just smile and move on.

    • Martel says:

      For now you just “catch gried”, but I wonder how long they’ll keep it at just that? Couldn’t that be considered ABUSE? You saw what happened to that Russian couple in that video I sent you.

      If a kid rides a bike without a helmet he MIGHT get hurt, but if he rides with one, he’ll DEFINITELY get hurt. It chips away at a kids spirit to feel like he’s some porcelain doll that needs protection from activities that kids have done for thousands of years.

      Homeschooling is just one of many fronts in what I’ve heard described as a Cold Civil War. As it stands, lots of folks who’ll need to stand together as allies aren’t even aware of each other. The manosphere, gun rights groups, survivialists, homeschoolers, entrepreneurs, Bible-based Christians. We all emphasize different values and issues, but we all know that something’s terribly off.

      • I don’t have faith that it’ll take long before they make things like that illegal. Look at all the nanny state laws recently. All the ways you’re not allowed to drive – without a seat belt, while texting, while talking on the phone, open container laws, etc.The push for self driving cars kills me a little inside because I know it won’t be long after that they force people to use the technology rather than drive themselves. No speeding, no messing with a chicks head as you swerve back and forth on purpose, no emotions involved. The biggest loss of all though would be that people won’t be able to get lost, or wander, or simply go where ever the road takes them. No danger or adventure.

        And you can see this push everywhere. The government and majority of the citizens are doing everything in their power to convince the rest of us it’s ok for them to take away our dangers, adventures, and freedoms to do so. If it wasn’t so infuriating and evil, they’d have my pity. Mostly they just get contempt and anger.

      • Stingray says:

        Wow, that sentence I wrote about homeschoolers is terrible. I meant that currently there are about 2,000,000 kids homeschooling. That number is rising everyday.

        About keeping it at just catching grief. I don’t know how long they’ll keep it at that. Scared kids are controlled kids. Same for the parents.

        It’s scary to think about. Liberals have been trying to squash homeschooling for years, but every tool that they have thrown at us has been a lie (kids don’t do as well, they aren’t socialized), but they have finally figured out one that isn’t a lie. We aren’t “tolerant”. At least not in the sense that they want us to be. Many homeschoolers are religious and don’t teach diversity as the liberals would have us do. This one has a chance to stick if they spin it correctly and no one will see that these people are not tolerant of our beliefs. It’s very scary to think about.

        In the mean time, my kids are having a chance to be kids. Skinned knees and all.

        We all emphasize different values and issues, but we all know that something’s terribly off.

        Yes. I have noticed however, some overlap between these different groups. That is encouraging.

      • Martel says:

        @ Beta: You perfectly describe why I see such an intrinsic connection between the values of the manosphere and opposing leftism. It’s the male drives for adventure and acheivement that created all this great stuff we have, and the nanny state is snuffing it out one boy, business, regulation, and politically correct censorship idea at a time.

        One of countless examples:

        @ Stingray: It was initially Rousseau’s idea, but Dewey (a socialist) planted the idea in people’s heads that the primary purpose of education is socialization, not necessarily learning stuff. And notice how awful the schools are at things like teaching kids to read.

        So even if home school kids win every national spelling and math bee and beat the snot out of other kids in every metric upon which education should be evaluated, they’re still failing the kids. Think of all the feminization, environmental indoctrination, anti-Americanism, and cooperative learning they’re missing out on?

        That said, some home schoolers do need to do a better job at giving their kids social opportunities. I knew one homeschooled girl (about 11). She was beautiful and absolutely brilliant but so socially awkward it almost hurt to talk to her.

  2. Stingray says:


    Yes, some homeschooled kids are awkward. Truly, as their parents hide them completely away. Skepticism is a good thing. Hiding one’s children in an effort to protect them is not much different than what you are talking about in your essay. It’s just a different route to the same end.

    Some are just different as they learn to speak to everyone. They aren’t locked away with 20-30 other kids their own age and they socialize much differently. Something I have had to figure out is that when I think some homeschool kids (my own included) are acting a bit strange, it is because I was public schooled and I put some certain expectations on them. When in reality, it’s my own bias from myself being locked away. My sense of normal socialization is skewed. When a child is raised learning to socialize with many different age groups and many different people all at the same time, they speak and relate very differently to the world than anyone in our predicament of going through the ranks of grade by grade and same age with same age for 13 years.

    • Martel says:

      I can’t check out that site now because I’m at work, but I definitely will soon.

      Personally, I’m acutely aware of insufficient socialization in kids because I was there myself. I wasn’t homeschooled, but I grew up in a neighborhood without many other kids so there was a lot of socialization I missed out on.

      So when I hear a kid talking who hasn’t been around other people enough, a little bell goes off in my head reminding me of myself. Likewise with a boy with a single mom without male role models (the type that grows into a beta, not the pro-thug Alpha type). There’s a speaking pattern that’s hard to describe, but I know it when I hear it.

      “Socialization” isn’t necessarily bad, per se. However, I’m not fond of the federal government doing it to our kids on a grand scale at the expense of the family and local communities. But like you said, because there’s so much awful stuff going on, some parents try to lock their kids away from it. Still, there’s a fine line between shielding them from negative influences and softening them so that they have no idea how to fight evil, or even coexist with it.

  3. Stingray says:


    You might like this. The videos there are excellent.

  4. Pingback: Beta Training | Alpha Is Assumed

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